So it took me a few days to get over the mind-crippling depression caused by having to drive the Mazda 323 Sedan, during which that time I learnt a few things. One, that apparently that horrible bucket of snot and boredom has a few sprightly cousins with 4WD and actual charisma, which is a claim I can barely believe and shall be following up in a future review. And two: that one of the strongest starter cars in the game is a Nissan Sunny, which is a claim that I can barely believe full stop. So you're telling me, knowledgeable people of the GTPlanet forums (in particular jeffgoddin, a man who's opinion I value highly) that one of the best hidden gems in this game is essentially a jumped-up hot hatch?
So I nipped over to the used car lots at the Nissan dealership and had a look, and my disbelief wasn't eased at all upon looking at the thing. I mean come on, this is the sort of garbage that you see patrolling Dartford High Street, driven by faux-macho twats in backwards caps and knock-off Nike trainers whilst annoying everyone else with too-loud dubstep and ridiculously aggressive dump valves. It even comes equipped with pointless gills, fins and spoilers that look like Granny being dressed up with bling necklaces and ray-ban sunglasses for a night out at bingo. At least the turgid 323 Sedan made it clear from the off that it was nothing more than a grey-suited accountant with a briefcase and a chronic impotency problem - this chav-mobile seems to be trying too damn hard to find performance credentials.
Except that it does have performance credentials. Plenty of them. How does 227hp sound for starters? And an overall weight of 1220kg? Just to put that into context, that's seven more horsepower than the 1991 Toyota Celica, in a car that weighs 180kg lighter. It also has the same drive system as the awesome Toyota, 4WD, and a very impressive 210lb/ft of torque. The chav in his ill-fitting baseball cap has come packing some serious heat to this particular turf war. Now those outlandish claims made earlier are starting to have more veracity to them. It's easy enough to miss, as well - technically this is the GTI-R model, but for some reason that acronym doesn't show up on the used car lot screen, and the car is listed just as 'Sunny'. Keep an eye out for it next time you're browsing - find it, and it'll brighten up your day no end.
As is often the case with Q cars, i.e. cars that are souped-up versions of rather mundane models, the chassis and handling isn't tailor-made for the extra power, therefore meaning cornering is a rather mixed bag. As is the case with many an unbalanced 4WD system, understeer is easy to achieve, and it takes a firm cuff round the head with the brakes to bring the mischievous Sunny into line - unless you really want to be ploughing tyre tracks through the gravel traps or scraping what's left of the car off the barriers, in which case be my guest. Like most unwieldy understeer-happy cars, a hard prod on the brakes to bring the nose down anchors the car nicely for corner entry (blimey, I almost sound like I know what I'm talking about), and as long as you adhere to this maxim and don't expect miracle roadholding on a par with a Scalextric car on a track layered in superglue, you'll be gleefully hugging the apexes in no time. Oddly enough for a car with such decent power figures, it doesn't exactly storm up to speed. This is perhaps the first car I've driven in a while that feels like it's going slower than it is, and I'm not sure if that's a point in the car's favour or not. As such, then, I wouldn't say this car is particularly fun to just hoon around in - unlike, say, my old Alfa Romeo GTA from GT4, this is not a car you'd take out one day to have a blast and remind yourself of just how fun driving can be. This car is made for a purpose, and it's single-minded ambition does get in the way of the experience somewhat.
But where the true fun of this car emerges is when you realise just how far this mindset can take this car, as in the heat of combat, this car is an oasis of calm and ruthless efficiency that belies it's cutesy-hatch origins. I seriously couldn't have had an easier time in the Sunday Cup race if I'd brought along a GT-One - even the trademark rubberbanding had no effect, and indeed I'm pretty sure the AI cars had actually given up on this tactic altogether by halfway around lap 2, safe in the knowledge it was having less effect than a smelly protester urinating on a monument has on influencing government policy. I then entered it into the 295hp limit Japanese Championship race, not exactly expecting miracles, and was treated to an exercise for hanging on for dear life as the fiercely determined Sunny went for victory once again - and came damn close. After a truly sensational performance where fenders crunched, tyres screeched and my little Nissan refused to give up, I eventually came home a close second, just over a second (most of that gap being made in the final straight) behind the winning Nissan Silvia Spec R Aero, and quite comfortably clear of the trailing field. Not long ago, I was finishing 3rd and feeling ashamed to be driving such crap. Now, I was finishing 2nd and feeling elated.
So, much like the football teams that take abuse from the fans for 'not playing the game the right way', this car won't win your heart with style, flair and oversteer. But as long as you keep winning, who gives a toss? And that's one thing this car is very good at: winning.
Rating: 84/100
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